Uncertainty about something is a
major cause of stress.
It is especially difficult when the
situation is uncontrollable and
you cannot predict what may
happen.
Here are some tips that can help you
to live with uncertainty:
Do what you can
First of all, do not let uncertainty paralyze you. Do what you can, talk to someone to get the
facts, etc. Then accept that you have done all you can and start thinking about
yourself and your reactions to uncertainty.
Recognize the uncertainty for what
it is
Uncertainty is an unpleasant and
distressing feeling that can interfere with daily life. Recognize that it is
the uncertainty that is causing the feelings and not necessarily the actual
situation you think you are worrying about.
Limit the Problem
Find some certainties to hang on to.
These will help you to feel more connected. A routine of going to work, taking your supplements or
eating meals in the usual way can help provide a feeling of certainty or
security. Or you may turn to your most reliable sources of support, such as
music, walking, or your friends.
Normalize your life
As far as possible, keep doing the
things you usually do, in the way that you usually do them. This is especially
important if you are preoccupied or distressed about somebody else. If you run
out of food, for example, because you were too worried to notice that the
cupboard was empty, you will feel worse.
Look after yourself
Treat yourself to something nice.
Look after yourself well when you are going through a difficult time – just as
you would look after someone else.
Do not withdraw
Pleasures, relaxations or
recreations often feel like an effort when you are preoccupied with
uncertainty. You may feel too tired or worried to bother. But withdrawing from
activities that you used to enjoy can leave you with even more time to focus
negatively on your own worries. Use them as distraction even if you no longer
enjoy them as much as you used to.
Talk to someone else about the
problem
Most people feel worse if they
isolate themselves with a worry. Try to find a balance between retreating
silently into yourself and repeatedly seeking reassurance or talking about
nothing other than your problems.
Keep the problem in perspective
It is only too easy to jump to the
conclusion that the worst possible thing will happen. The more you think about
bad things that might happen, the more likely they seem and the harder it is to
see how to cope with them.
Do not jump to any conclusions about situations.
Wait to find out the facts, before making assumptions about what you will do or
what will happen. The worst usually does not happen.
Turn your mind to something else
Distraction is a very useful
strategy, providing that it is not the only one you use. If you have first done
all you can to sort out the problem, then do something else to prevent your
mind from dwelling on it.
Take the pressure off
Living with uncertainty is tiring.
It can deplete your resources, so do not take on extra commitments, if you can
help it. Make sure that you are eating well and getting as much sleep as you
can. Also take exercise to keep up your strength and stamina.
Ask: What good might come of this in
the end?
Uncertainty is unsettling, but old
patterns of living may have become stale or sterile. Being swept along with the
current of life can help people to adapt in creative ways, to develop new
skills or to overcome old anxieties. It is not always a bad thing to have one’s
foundations shaken up by uncertainties, even though the period of adjustment
may be painful and difficult.
Use meditation or prayer to help you
put your situation into context
It is often possible to use prayer
or meditation to provide a wider perspective on uncertainty.
Believing that we are here to learn and to experience the full range of
emotions can help us to accept things we find difficult, because they can be
seen as part of a wider process, which leaves us more empowered as a result of
having lived through the changes or the uncertainty.
Belief in a greater purpose can allow acceptance of
a situation. Another way of learning to
tolerate uncertainty is to meditate using the mantra ‘This too will pass’.
Every situation has to end. You can use this to get you through the worst of an uncertain situation.
Every situation has to end. You can use this to get you through the worst of an uncertain situation.
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