Those
who work with a wellness coach know that in order to
succeed with a balanced and low-stress life creation one must start about putting
oneself at the top of the list, loving yourself first and honoring your
needs.
To
better focus on loving yourself remember these five important messages.
1. It’s okay to appreciate yourself.
We
are taught from childhood that to appreciate yourself is vain, and vanity is
not good. Modesty is an admirable quality, but we often do too good a job
selling modesty to ourselves and therefore diminishing our self-appreciation
for those things that we have accomplished and done well.
2. It’s okay to desire for yourself.
We
are taught to share early in life. Again, this is an admirable quality. The
problem is that as we seek the love and acceptance of our parents and elders
many of us become expert at self-sacrifice without learning that some of our
dreams will only be accomplished if we focus on our own wants and needs.
3. It’s okay to be yourself.
If
you experienced love being turned on and off to you as a child, you probably
decided that your worth and goodness depends on your ability to please others.
Simply being yourself in this situation earned you little praise or
recognition.
4. It’s okay to make mistakes.
Young
children catch on quickly that love is often conditional. In the face of a
mistake, love is withheld and the pattern is established that mistakes are made
at the price of affection either from others or from yourself.
5. It’s okay to express yourself.
The
effort to please your parents, family and friends often comes at the price of
self-expression. You become preoccupied with becoming like other people and
surrender the chance to express your own uniqueness. In time you learn to live
with a sense of inner failure and frustration because you have buried your
potential for success.
Take
these five messages to heart and think about how you have denied yourself the
benefits of self-appreciation in your life. Learning to love yourself is not an
overnight transition, but as you process the lessons found in these five steps
you will begin to take that critical and life changing journey.
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